Are relationships formed online less happy?
People who meet their partners on the internet may experience lower marital satisfaction and feel love less intensely than those who meet in person. At least, that is what emerges from research conducted by an international team of scientists led by dr Marta Kowal from the UWr Institute of Psychology.
Drawing on data collected in 50 countries by the Being Human Lab at the University of Wrocław, directed by Professor S. Craig Roberts, the researchers studied 6,646 people in relationships, analysing whether the way they met their partners was linked to the level of love they reported feeling and to their relationship satisfaction.
– People who met their partners online reported lower levels of relationship satisfaction and experienced love less intensely – including intimacy, passion and commitment – compared with those who met offline – concludes prof. Piotr Sorokowski from the UWr Institute of Psychology, co-author of the study.
According to the researchers, the findings may be explained by several factors, including the fact that couples who meet offline are usually more homogamous – that is, they share more similar characteristics – than those who meet online. – Similar social backgrounds and education may positively influence relationship quality, fostering greater social support and acceptance, shared life experiences, and alignment of values and worldviews – notes prof. S. Craig Roberts, co-author of the study.
The internet offers access to what seems to be an unlimited pool of potential partners, but while this abundance might help individuals find their ‘ideal’ match, in practice it often results in choice overload.
Survey participants answered questions about, among other things, intimacy, passion and commitment – elements regarded in psychology as the foundations of love. In all of these areas, people who had met their partners online scored, overall, lower. The greatest differences concerned the sense of commitment: those in online-formed relationships were less likely to feel that their partnership was “for life”. This pattern of results was observed in most of the 50 countries studied. The differences are not large, but they are marked enough to prompt psychologists to reflect on possible causes.
– The results surprised us somewhat, because, for instance, American research from 13 years ago suggested the opposite – that couples who met online were actually more satisfied with their relationships – admits dr Marta Kowal from the University of Wrocław in an interview with PAP.
In her view, one of the reasons for this change may be not so much different research methodologies, but the evolution of online dating itself. In the past, dating sites were oriented towards fostering long-term relationships. Today, the dominant platforms are apps focusing on short-term encounters. This, from the very outset, does not always encourage the development of deeper bonds.
The authors of the study recall earlier analyses: in the mid-20th century, heterosexual couples most often met through friends (around 30%) or family (around 27%), as well as at school (24%). At the beginning of the 21st century, however, meeting partners online took the lead – currently declared by 39% of those in relationships. Among traditional venues, bars and restaurants still hold a strong position (27%), as do introductions via friends (20%).
Why do offline-formed relationships tend to have higher average satisfaction? Previous studies indicate that couples who meet online are more likely to differ in a range of characteristics: age, race, worldview, wealth, religion or social status. Yet similarity in these areas typically fosters relationship quality. Moreover, couples who meet offline often share mutual acquaintances, which brings greater social support. – It also matters that online it is easier to present oneself in a way that departs from reality – as Marta Kowal points out, as many as half of online daters admit to providing false information in their profiles, for instance inflating their height or downplaying their weight.
However, the researcher stresses that many relationships started online are highly successful, and the internet often gives people a chance to find a partner when they might not otherwise have had the opportunity. One therefore cannot say that online dating is “worse”. – It is an increasingly common phenomenon, but still relatively under-researched – she notes.
And how can one enhance satisfaction in an existing relationship? A sure way is to engage together in new, exciting activities. The key is for the couple to try something neither of them has done before. Such experiences boost passion, intimacy, satisfaction and commitment – dr Marta Kowal tells PAP.
The study was conducted by a team of researchers from the Being Human Lab at the University of Wrocław, in collaboration with colleagues from the Australian National University and the University of Stirling. The findings were published in the journal Telematics and Informatics.
Sources:
Couples who meet online less happy in love, study shows
PAP Nauka w Polsce: Miłość z internetu mniej intensywna? Wyniki międzynarodowych badań
More information about dr Marta Kowal’s academic work and achievements:
Complied by: Katarzyna Górowicz-Maćkiewicz
Added by: S.F.
Date of publication: 20.08.2025
